here’s a 3d computer model i built recently:

meet rolf and dolf! these USBeasts will eat your portable flash drives for breakfast and crush your binary with both their heads! this was a present for a friend that started out as me wanting to make a mix cd and spiraled out of control…

they spontaneously manifested out of armature wire, aluminum foil, super sculpey, acrylic paint, acrylic gloss medium, and two 2 gig usb drives they decided to eat and cram into the side of your macbook when it’s not looking, to play you battle music.

you might say “smo, instead of using two 2 gig usb drives why not just use one 4 gig one? so people can look at all the information on the drives at once?” to which i would reply “because this wolf has two heads and they’re both hungry, poindexter!”

these guys were almost triplets, due to the drives i mangled coming in a 3 pack; but i think you’ll agree that fran krause really needed to be made aware of the works of ronnie james dio, so that extra drive was put to good use! also it seemed like they might have a difficult time jamming their faces into a usb port otherwise, but hey, there’s always extension cables for that sorta thing, right?!

i’m thinking about making some stuff like this to bring to comic cons this year…WOULD YOU GIVE ME MONEY FOR THINGS LIKE THIS?! would you like to see stuff without usb drives being digested too? PLEASE TELL ME INTERNET!!!

next time: “we finish what we started [2 years ago]” or “what’s a two part mold?”…

you can only confront them by approaching their reflection.

only the bravest most masterful of artisans attempt to capture their likeness and to do so they must draw the creatures backwards on parchment with only the aid of brush and ink.

i melted 3 different brushes while inking this, the demonic fires shooting up from the bike tires were too intense for my windsor newton series 7 but i pressed on.

to the right is a digitally remastered version of what we think the creature may have looked like were it drawn directly without the need for a mirror.

because they’re tough enough to handle it and they have access to shiny reflective things like mirrors they break because they laugh in the face of bad luck; i am sending this drawing to the silver sprocket bike club.

they love bikes and songs about demons that’s why they handle bands like the groovie ghoulies. that’s right they’re a bike club that deals in rock and roll! sick!

a few months ago they made me an honorary member of their crew, even though they’re stationed in califonia and i’m in brooklyn.

their spokes are true.

artist statement:

“i drew these smaller ones first then i drew the bigger one. after inking the red guy i made some ink from blackberries and colored in his eyes and gums. goes on red, comes out purple. brutal.”

to be a freaking sick hunter gatherer and make your own ink go out and ravage some bushes [the berry kind]

if you decimate 1/2 cup of berries add 1/2 tsp of vinegar and 1/2 tsp of salt. you can change the proportions too: for 1/4 cup use 1/4 tsp. i just threw crap together and crushed it.

try and scoop out the guts before you add the other junk. or cram them through a colander or busted up window screen so you get all berry blood. keep it in a little jar locked up tight so it doesn’t magic itself to death.

the vinegar helps the color stick.  the salt keeps if from turning into rotted fruit stank.

i found out about the vinegar stuff on this wussy website.

if you don’t know what the different between tsp and tbsp is punch yourself in the teeth.